The following post is something James Edwards wrote for me that we both agreed would be a good follow-up to a post he wrote for this site 2 years ago. In that one, he shared his experience having found out an ex-girlfriend aborted a baby he had with her. Due to the current political and spiritual climate in the USA and elsewhere thanks to the internet and fast spread of information on social media, we thought a newer article was a better idea than just resharing the previous one on social media.
-Steve Bremner
A few years ago I penned a guest blog for this blog called ‘They Outnumber The Stars: Abortion From a Male Perspective.’ While I stand by the words I wrote then, I was overwhelmed with forgiveness upon reading it recently in light of several states in the United States severely restricting and in some cases banning the act of abortion. Now I am not sure these restrictions and criminalization of people who get abortions will stand, but I am hopeful that these are the first steps to showing how wrong we have been.
How wrong we have been with our pursuit of such a gruesome practice.
I preface all of my remarks by saying that I forgive you, Shining Shannon of Florida (not her real name of course), but not knowing how to communicate directly with you, I hope one day you will see this and know that I have put aside the anger and hurt that I have held in my heart for so long towards you for having aborted my child without talking to me about it first.
This post comes after years of self-evaluation and finding myself in a place of freedom that a few years ago seemed like a dream, like one that would never happen. In this beautiful mystery that I find myself in, I want nothing more than to pour out this Grace on others that is being poured so liberally over me.
When I wrote the last article, I thought I was so passionate for Jesus. I thought that my relationship with God couldn’t be any better, or at least on the surface. You see, on the other side I had a lot of struggles, and there was a lot of stuff about myself that I hated. I was addicted to pornography, I was depressed and angry, fearful and conspiratorial. My friends didn’t know this because that was a side of me that I hid because I was so ashamed. But.
But — and this is a huge BUT — I was set free in August of 2017.
Set free from pornography.
Set free from depression and anger.
Set free from being fearful and conspiratorial.
It is important to note in this article because when I wrote the last time here on Steve’s blog I honestly hated Shannon. Outwardly, I would have never said that, but now I can admit it because I have nothing but LOVE for Shannon and for all these women who feel backed into a corner and decided to have an abortion.
But I still think the fathers should be involved in such a decision like abortion. They, too, should have a say-so.
These women sometimes resort to this horrible thing because they feel like they don’t have any other choice. They feel like they can’t raise these kids comfortably or whatever other issue they have convinced themselves of.
Maybe they don’t have help, maybe they are afraid, maybe they were raped, or sexually assaulted by a family member, even though statistically that accounts for less than 1% of all abortions performed in the USA every year. Most Americans that are raised in church are raised to feel like we are dirty, evil creatures, separated from a Holy God. We are conditioned to believe we have to “crucify our own flesh”, or that we “must die daily”, or that we are enemies of God. These women are no exception, and when they make this decision they already feel like they aren’t good enough to raise kids in one way or another.
Christians protesting at abortion clinics confirm their worst fears, from these horrible signs that are waived, to forceful blocking. They aren’t loving the mothers that feel like they are making the best decision in their current situation. Not all of the protestors are like this, but you instinctively know the ones I am referring to: The ones who think bombing clinics is justified, the ones who feel like threatening Hell and punishment is commendable.
Christians, listen to me.
I mean really listen.
Kindness wins people to a changed heart and mind.
His Kindness wins them to repentance.
His Love changes hearts and minds.
His Love restores, rebuilds, and revives.
His Love resurrects those who we thought were dead.
His Love resurrected all of us with Christ, we just don’t all realize that yet.
We are still consumed by a do-it-ourselves mentality when it was all finished on the Cross. And it is in this Finished Work that we can just love these mothers who feel like they have nowhere else to go. Instead of running around banging bells and shouting “shame,” we should be running to these women and hugging them with the same fervor that the father did when the Prodigal Son returned home. We should be helping to lift their burdens instead of piling more shame on them than they already feel.
Love.
Truly Love.
Love keeps no record of wrongs.
Forgive.
Truly Forgive.
Forgive like there was never a wrong committed.
It is in this abortion will end. When these women who run to the abortion clinics see Jesus in themselves they will be able to change their minds. In order for them to see Jesus in themselves we must see Jesus in them.
Be Jesus toward them, love them as Jesus Loves you.