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Love: The More Excellent Way, part 3

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“And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. Love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment, because in this world we are like him. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The man who fears has not been made perfect in love.” 1 John 4:16-18

In our first part of this series, we looked at how the love of God as motivation for operating in and serving with the Spiritual gifts was more important than any use of the gifts in and of themselves. Our phraseology has been that ‘love [agape] is better than wine [works of the Spirit] but not excluding them as mentioned in Song of Solomon 1:2, and 4:10. We’ve been establishing the context for which I’ve been saying those things: that the gifts and ministries of the holy Spirit are not either/or, but both/and and that true filling and operating in the Holy Spirit will also be characterized by love for God and for one another. Then in our second part, we looked at Ephesians 5:17-33 for another witness in Scripture about this and how it ties into the Bridal paradigm of the New Testament. Reading the first two parts of this study will be highly beneficial for proceeding further, but not necessary. Hopefully we’ll destroy some misconceptions about the fear of God. Let’s face it, how can we be intimate with someone if we’re afraid of Him?

The reason I’d like to look at these verses from 1 John for some reflection and meditating in this context of our series, is because most of us still view God with fear, instead of awe. Many people feel obligated–myself included oftentimes to be completely honest–to obey God out of fear instead of out of love and appreciation of Him. Many preachers I love listening to and reading emphasize the consequence of disobedience, and the consequences of sin, and talking about what we’ve been saved FROM, but they don’t nearly emphasize as much what we’ve been saved TO. The side effect as a result, is fear, shame, and guilt motivating much preaching rather than obedience as a fruit of intimacy.

Love Instead of Fear as a Motivation For Obedience

In Revelation 1: 17 we read the Apostle John say upon seeing Jesus in all his glory in the verses preceding, that “When I saw him, I fell at his feet as though dead.” Most of us don’t finish the sentence and read Jesus’ reaction to this: “But he laid his right hand on me saying, “Fear not.” Even though Jesus is clothed in all his splendor–and the human heart’s reaction would be to be fearful of being struck by lightning or something of that sort–we are SAFE in the presence of the Savior. He reaches out His hand, yearning for us to come near and not fear.

A friend of mine once remarked to me that most of us are so preoccupied with loving God with all our heart, that we forget to realize and accept how much He loves us. Author, speaker and teacher S.J. Hill says this:

Personally, I’m deeply troubled by messages that use the fear of punishment as a motivation for obedience. Jesus deserves so much better! In fact, if our obedience is not motivated by love, it’s not the kind of obedience Jesus is wanting from us in the first place. If some want to talk about God testing our motives, then let’s talk about the proper motivation for walking in holiness. Our obedience must be affection-based. If it isn’t, then it’s not true obedience at all. How can an obedience motivated by a fear of punishment in this life or the life to come really be pleasing to the Lord?

In my book, ENJOYING GOD, I write, “Passages such as 1 Corinthians 3:10-15 have been used to provoke individuals to radical obedience. However, what’s overlooked is John’s statement in 1 John 4:16-18 (Emphasis mine)

There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The man who fears has not been made perfect in love.‘” (v 18)

Most of us mistakenly view fearing God as the same thing as being afraid of Him. How on earth could we be intimate with Him if we were afraid of Him? How many children have had deep meaningful relationship with their earthly fathers if they were afraid of them–maybe growing up in abusive situations? Afraid that at any given moment the father might fly off the handle and snap. When you’re afraid of a parent, you’re not going to be close to Him.

We’re not going to spend eternity with God afraid He might wake up one day in a bad mood. There won’t be some day in the year 5 million, where we hear a loud grouchy thunderous voice, and have fear instilled in us as we ask someone nearby ‘what was that?

Oh, that was God–He’s in a bad mood today! Don’t look at Him wrong!

Of course not! He is the most pleasant person to be around, and our worship of Him should reflect that.

The fear of the Lord is more rightly translated as the awe of Him. We are to be in as much awe and fascination of Him as possible. The idea that He dwells in unapproachable light is not to be taken to mean HE is unapproachable, but that that is our reaction in holy fascination of His beauty.

Putting the Cart Before the Horse

“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.” (Matthew 7:21-23)

This is a very important and sobering concept and you might not have heard it put this way before, but hear me out: I’ve heard fear-based messages on this taught more times than not, using this passage to point out that just because people do things in the name of the Lord doesn’t mean they’ll be in heaven. I don’t disagree with that, but I think it’s over-emphasized by most. Notice the things mentioned–these people were proclaiming to Jesus that they were prophesying, casting out demons in His name, and performing mighty works which one cannot do in His name without being saved and filled with the Holy Spirit. They were boasting of all the great ministry they were doing in His name. His response isn’t that he merely didn’t know them, but the text says never. Not just because they didn’t know him, but because they didn’t know Him and then after the comma, in the same sentence He states, “you [are] workers of lawlessness“–or as other translations put this phrase–’workers of iniquity.’

I’d like to submit for consideration a different angle to view this from: it’s not just that these people were workers of lawlessness or iniquity who this will be said to on that day when the sheep are separated from the goats, but that doing anything–even of the spiritual gifts–WITHOUT agape love and coming from a place OTHER than out of agape love and intimacy with Christ–is itself iniquity. Even when our motives are good, our righteous deeds are still as filthy rags (Isa 64:6). Hosea 6:6 mentions how God desires mercy–or as some translations say loyalty–more than sacrifice, which could signify the ‘right’ religious rituals and activity. God wants us, and stands at the door knocking so that He may fellowship with us, first and foremost. Anything ministry-wise that we will ever do effectively for God must come from a place of intimacy with Him. It is such a reason as this that He will take one look at many, and say “I don’t know you. In fact, I never knew you.” It’s not that spending time in intimacy with Christ is important so that He won’t cast you aside on that day, but because NONE of the works you could ever do for Him to present to Him on that day will have any significance if they aren’t birthed from an intimate relationship with Him.

The point is not to put fear in our hearts for why we’re doing things for the Lord so that on judgment day we will not be cast aside as people He doesn’t know. Rather, I want to encourage you to just focus on your intimacy with God first and foremost, and then take ministry and your deeds for the lord–your operations in the gifts of the Spirit such as the prophesying, healing and casting out demons like mentioned–let these things flow FROM your intimacy with Christ.

I speak from experience as well as just posing the question: how many of us rely on our works, our ministry, our deeds for God to replace our relationship with God? How many of us are so preoccupied and busy doing ministry, that we have no relationship with God? Friends, never allow yourself to get to a place where you’re too busy to spend time with the lover of your soul, because you’ve put the cart before the horse and are finding yourself too busy to spend time with him.


For further discussion on these matters, be sure to check out our most recent episode of the Fire On Your Head Podcast where we discuss love-empowered holiness and asked the question “Do Happiness and Holiness Mix?” with speaker and author S.J. Hill and missionary & world traveler Gregg Montella.


Download this episode (right click and save)

Love: The More Excellent Way, part 2

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“How much better is your love than wine, and the fragrance of your oils than any spice!” Song of Solomon 4:10b

“And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.” Ephesians 5:2

We began in our previous article with this verse from the Song of Solomon to establish our premise for these series of articles on the love of God flowing through the believer. The context surrounding that verse establishes that the Bridegroom, Christ, is speaking to His Bride, the Church stating we have ‘captivated His heart’ (verse 9). Our worship and adoration–and just simply our obedience to come follow Him and be in awe and reverent fear of Him–does something in his heart. He gets some type of satisfaction from our worshipful, fasted lifestyles that He doesn’t get in another way.

We also began in the last post to elaborate on the fact the wine speaks of the best this life has to offer and not sinful or guilty pleasures. Since most oftentimes wine is associated with the Holy Spirit, we’re then assuming that the Spirit being poured out is a good thing, BUT a foundational starting point for this love walk we’re going on. So allow me to show you another part of this journey, of just what happens when the love of God has been shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Spirit.

Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit, addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.” (Ephesians 5:17-21, emphasis mine)

As we established in our previous article by looking at 1 Corinthians 12, 13, and 14 to show that the gifts of the Spirit are foundational–but love is the more excellent, and the greater way–then it makes sense also that one of the evidences of a born again believer truly being filled with the Holy Spirit, is going to be love. If we are operating in all manner of gifts of the Spirit, but have not love, then it is pointless and we are nothing (see 1 Cor 13:1-2). If we are constantly, and regularly being filled with the Holy Spirit on an ongoing basis, then it won’t just be evidenced by speaking in tongues, prophecies, psalms, hymns and so on, but we will also be submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.

Dare I say it: the REAL evidence of being filled with the Holy Spirit, is love for one another–not at the expense of the gifts such as tongues, but on top of it, including the gifts. How do I know this? Well, I could post too large a list of Scriptures dealing with commandments to love, but let me focus on a few things that tie into our Bridal paradigm specifically, and the direction I’m going in with this series of articles:

We love because he first loved us. If anyone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen. And this commandment we have from him: whoever loves God must also love his brother. (1 John 4:19-20, emphasis mine)

We must remember a few things about the Apostle John: he had a revelation of the love of God which obviously would affect his perspective. He referred to himself in his gospel account as the one Jesus loved. In the end of that Gospel, he said that if all the works Jesus did were recorded, the world would not be able to contain the books (John 21:25). Therefore, what we have written in our Scripture canon does not contain any wasted pages. All of it is divinely arranged to be there for a reason. John lived to be a ripe old age and it’s commonly held by many that he wrote this and his other two epistles towards the very end of his life, even after he wrote The Revelation he received while exiled on the island of Patmos. It is for this reason then, we can reasonably interpret the book of Revelation through the lens of the LOVE of God he had, and when one does, we see the matter of the coming of the Lord in a whole different light than just stuff that belongs in Left Behind fiction books–but one of a marriage finally coming to realization. The book is a revelation of the Bridegroom–lovesick for His Bride–coming back to finally marry her. John had that revelation, but I digress a little from where I’m going with this.

If John took the time to write these 5 chapters, then this stuff MUST be some of the most important things he felt worth sharing with the recipient of this letter, and the Church. Therefore, if at the ripe old age of 90 or maybe even 100 this was what he had to say after decades of intimate relationship with The Bridegroom–after decades of public ministry– then it’s wise of us to take seriously, and meditate and ponder things from his perspective. We need the perspective of the one who knew his identity in the Bride of Christ, and knew himself as the one Jesus loved.

How do I know this whole “wine of the Spirit and being filled, speaking to one another, and submitting to one another” thing ties into this whole Bridal paradigm? Because the rest of the chapter goes on to say so:

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. (Eph 5:22-24)

Sometimes I really hate the chapter breaks and title headers the publishers of our Bible translations put in there, because the original manuscripts were not broken down into chapters and verses, and certainly didn’t have subject headings like most of our Bibles say. I’m only mentioning that because even though they’re helpful for finding specific passages and parables, when reading they sometimes inadvertently give the reader the impression new topics are starting. However, this is a part of the same flow of thought the author had. Jesus taught in complete subjects, even if the English Standard Version I’m reading this from breaks things down into seemingly different topics, when the apostles and epistle writers wrote in entire concepts. Let’s keep reading:

“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” (Eph. 5:25-33, emphasis mine)

Remember, we love God because He first loved us (1 John 4:19), and Christ has sought out His Bride since before the foundation of the world. He is talking here of presenting His Bride to Himself at the marriage of the Lamb. Christ cherishes the Church. She’s His own Body. He nourishes her. Christ ‘left’ His Father, in the eternal heavenly realm, to come down to our earth that He may gather His Bride to bring her where He Himself is. He cried out on the cross “My God, my God why have you forsaken me?” (Matt 27:46) as he bore the sin of His Bride so as to make her pure and spotless before God. As Jesus was feeling that weight of sin, He was experiencing separation from God for the only time in all of eternity. It was at this time that 2 Corinthians 5:21 occurred, “God made Him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God.”

Now, if we have truly been born from above, and filled with the Holy Spirit, we’re going to respect Christ the way the wife is to respect her husband. So if we respect Christ, out of the response we have towards Him as he loves us, then we will not do anything to hurt His Bride that we’re apart of. We will lay our life down for one another. We will speak encouragement, not gossip. We will submit to one another, preferring the other as better than ourselves.

Let’s submit to one another out of reverence for Christ, for He finds that to be better than wine.

“So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.” 1 Corinthians 13:13

Love: The More Excellent Way, part 1

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“How much better is your love than wine, and the fragrance of your oils than any spice!” (Song of Solomon 4:10b)

“And I will show you a still more excellent way.” (1 Corinthians 12:31b)

In the opening of the Song of Solomon—my favorite book in the Old Testament—the Shulammite shepherdess states of her lover that his love is better than wine (SoS 1:2). Then, midway through the song when he speaks of what fascinates him about her, we’re told the same thing. This writer believes the Song of Solomon is to be interpreted as a representation of the Bridegroom’s love towards the Church, His Bride. We know that Jesus is better than anything in this world, and the obvious interpretation of that phrase would lead the believer to say “of course it is!” and agree.

Therefore, if He is saying of her that her love is better than wine, then we can automatically rule out that He’d be saying her love is better than any sin since he lived a sinless life and died to save us from our sins, and would not have engaged in any carnal pleasure that he’d compare her love with. Continue Reading…

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